Posted by kellycarcione | Posted in Kelly Carcione | Posted on 10-05-2013
Tags: Kelly Carcione, Mommy to be, Mother's Day, phone, technology
A few weeks ago, I took my kids to a birthday party where I didn’t know many of the parents. They all knew each other and everyone was very pleasant. Yet, I noticed something odd about ten minutes into the party. The moms were all still talking to each other, but every one of them had an iPhone out, scrolling through who knows what in the midst of conversation. Quaint dings and dongs were going off, pretty little heads were bobbling and there was an occasional, “Oh, look, I have a picture of that right here!”
Once I noticed it at the party, I started noticing it EVERYWHERE. The mom at the playground nodding away her child’s, “Look at me, Mommy!” on the monkey bars. The patient checking in at the OB/GYN office, texting while whispering her name and birthdate to the receptionist. At the spa, in the bathrobe, fresh from a massage, ON THE PHONE. Women leaning over shopping carts while kids grab cereal boxes off of store shelves. Nannies walking down the street with toddlers ambling half a block behind them, completely oblivious to their surroundings. And yes, moms in the car with kids, on the phone while driving past the elementary school! (With a Baby On Board bumper sticker, to boot!)
I know we are all pulling our phones out to carry us through dull moments in our day: elevators, waiting rooms, long lines. We take videos, find directions and retrieve immediate pop trivia answers that linger on the tips of our tongues. I understand why teenagers do this at boring family functions.
I’ve given an iPhone to my kids in restaurants to make it through the meal. I get it. Tonight, I will probably download an app to keep track of my contractions. And I bet I’ll be tempted to reach for that phone not ten minutes after this baby is born to call home while nurses are cleaning up my newborn, if I can wrestle it away from my husband snapping a hundred pictures a minute. Technology is woven into the very fabric of our culture and daily lives. Really, I get it!
But moms! Come on! Can’t we have old-fashioned adult conversations and look each other in the eye? I know we are multitasking all the time but this is an unhealthy compulsion. We need to take the lead on this before our kids start expecting the instant gratification of youtube or angry birds before they even hit preschool.
I challenge you all this Mother’s Day to actually stop and enjoy this day devoted to you. Resist the urge to send out cheesy e-greetings to your closest 500 mom friends while checking for witty comments to your posts with Pavlovian fervor. You do not need to “like” every scalloped-edge poem about the joys of motherhood, or scroll through endless albums of mother’s day mishaps. Hello! Your kid spent an hour making that adorable card. Look up from the screen! The most important relationships you have are with the people here. With you. Now.
Come Monday, when you update that Facebook profile with a beautiful picture of your family post-brunch, you can be sure that those smiles are authentic. And then you can tweet about it.
Happy Mother’s Day, everyone!